While Meghan Markle and Prince Harry pose as injured saints returning to the United Kingdom after six years of cashing in on the monarchy they trashed, a filthy old rumor has roared back onto social media — and this time the pile-on is vicious.
A circulating post published Saturday pairs two old photographs of Markle with different men and asks, in the crudest possible language, which of them she was allegedly servicing. One picture shows her standing in a field with Soho House fixer Markus Anderson. The other is a tight black-and-white selfie with Canadian chef Cory Vitiello, the boyfriend she was still living with when she began circling Prince Harry. Beside those photos is a doctored Deal or No Deal still of Markle as a briefcase model, grinning over a case stamped with a three-word slogan too filthy to reprint in full. The quoted caption calls the whole package “the grossest thing ever” and says even the Kardashians “did not go this low.”
That is the internet being the internet. What keeps the story from dying is the man who first sold it.
In a podcast clip now being recirculated under the overlay “There was a sex tape of HER allegedly EATING ASS,” Hollywood tape broker Kevin Blatt — the same operator tied to the Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian videos — claims a woman in Canada contacted him before the royal wedding and offered footage of a then-unknown actress performing oral sex on a man, specifically anilingus. Blatt says he asked who it was. The answer, he insists, was: “Her name is Meghan, and she’s about to marry a prince.” He has repeated the story for years. He has never produced the tape. He says he deleted what he was sent and that the woman in Canada kept the original. No major newsroom has authenticated the video. Markle has never publicly addressed the specific claim. That has not stopped the clip from being treated as gospel by people who already despise her.
The photos being used as “evidence” are not new. Anderson has been Markle’s constant shadow since her Suits years in Toronto: wedding guest, baby-shower body man, the friend she once posted about with “I love you SO much.” Gossip sites have spent a decade calling him her “real husband.” Vitiello is the chef she dated from 2014 until mid-2016. Multiple accounts, including Tom Bower’s reporting, say she was still sharing a house with him when she was set up with Harry. The timeline has always looked messy. Harry married her anyway.
None of that proves a sex tape exists. It does prove something else: the Duchess of Sussex built a global brand on wounded dignity, online cruelty, and “compassion,” then spent years lecturing the British press, the Royal Family, and anyone who asked a hard question. The woman who quit Deal or No Deal because she said it made her feel like a “bimbo” later took a 90210 cameo that required her character’s head in a man’s lap. The couple who fled Britain citing “unsafe” media then sold the family for a Netflix special, a memoir that detonated the monarchy from the inside, and a lifestyle brand that has struggled to stay relevant. Now they want Britain back.
Harry’s role in this is not innocent bystander. He walked away from the institution that raised him, accused his own blood of racism and neglect, demanded taxpayer-grade security as a private citizen, and still presents himself as the victim. He hitched his name, his titles, and his children’s identities to a woman whose pre-royal résumé was mid-tier television, social climbing, and a trail of relationships that never quite ended cleanly. If even a fraction of the Blatt story is true, he did not just marry an actress. He married a scandal he chose not to inspect. If it is false, he still married a woman whose entire public strategy is to scream “bullying” the moment anyone looks at the record.
The Palace, according to the same rumor mill, supposedly “scrubbed” the tape. That claim is convenient for both camps: Markle’s enemies get a cover-up, her defenders get a conspiracy. What is not rumor is the couple’s conduct since Megxit. Archewell’s shine faded. Spotify walked. Netflix cooled. The UK security fight became a soap opera of leaks and 11th-hour theatrics. William is said to want nothing to do with a rival court on his doorstep. Charles, ill and cautious, is not about to restore them as working royals. They are coming home as private citizens who already spent the goodwill.
That is why this particular rumor is landing now. It is not because the British public suddenly discovered anilingus. It is because Markle spent six years branding herself as the moral adult in the room while Harry played wounded spare. The moment they need Britain again, the oldest, ugliest file comes off the shelf. Hypocrites attract that kind of weather.
No tape has been published. Blatt’s story remains one man’s unverified account. The meme is a smear. The photos are real. The contempt is earned. A woman who made victimhood her product should not be shocked when the product turns on her. A prince who torched his family to platform her should not be shocked when the platform starts to burn.
Britain does not owe them a soft landing. Harry chose the hustle. Meghan chose the myth. The internet, for once, is simply refusing to play along.
